Triscuits: Sage, Cranberry and Thyme


A parody of a song by Simon and Garfunkel.  A Collaboration by Jason Fuse in Los Angeles & Bill Springer in Fairfax, VA
Recorded: 03/02/2015  Released: 03/02/2015  First aired: unaired
 View the Airtime Calendar


Idea and lyrics by Bill Springer. I liked the idea so much that I finally decided to disregard my lack of Simon and Garfunkel skills and make an attempt.

Will you send me some Triscuits for free?
Just not Sage, Cranberry and Thyme?
Parmesan Garlic, or Brown Rice with Sugar
Those are all favorites of mine

Give me Sweet Onion, Cracked Pepper, and Sea Salt
(Plus some bacon for Jean)
Just no Sage, Cranberry and Thyme
(I stuff them all in my mouth)
They're not on my diet but I eat them by the box-load
(I also like eating hard-boiled eggs)
'Til my scale passes one-ninety-nine
(And I'm so fat)

Start shipping me product, send it A.S.A.P
But keep Sage, Cranberry and Thyme
I eat them with ice cream, standing at my sink
And wash it all down with a bottle of wine.

Parody of "Scarborough Fair" - Simon and Garfunkel

Related Jingles

The Ballad of Charlie and Gretchen - Pt. 1 by Jason Fuse
Javolina! by Mike
Le Cheese (Le Freak) by Jason Fuse
Bracketology (Choppin' Broccoli) by Jason Fuse
What is Tony Actually Looking For? by Kj Ohnstad

Join the conversation

Your Name
judofuse in Atlanta
Cool. Happy to record this one. Was a great idea and words.
868 days ago.
Bill Springer in Fairfax, VA
Finally got around to sending this one in. Not sure about its odds for airplay given that Triscuits are much less the hot topic as compared to when this idea first occurred to me ... but I guess we'll just have to wait and see. In either case, thx to Judofuse for taking a chance on an unknown "songwriter".
868 days ago.
judofuse in Atlanta
Thanks, I appreciate the good words. :) And thanks for the info Brad. Now, I better get back to work on my full length "We Didn't Eat the Triscuits" parody.
871 days ago.
joeythejammer in Ellicott City, MD
This is immediately one of my TOP TEN ALL TIME FAVORITES!!!! Oh they better play this one. GREATNESS!!!
871 days ago.
Brad Weiss in Carrboro, NC
No you did nothing wrong! Mr. Negrelli is just a big fan of Triscuits. Big fan.
878 days ago.
judofuse in Atlanta
Besides trying to sing an Art Garfunkel cover, did I do something else stupid with this one? FYI, I didn't send this one in to the show. I wanted Bill to have the option, so he can chose to use it or not. Plus, you really don't want me sending anything in for consideration :)
878 days ago.
Brad Weiss in Carrboro, NC
I think Jerry's head is exploding in the best possible way . . .
878 days ago.
Bill Springer in Fairfax, VA
Nice. Vocals sound like Art Garfunkel meets Nick Cave
878 days ago.